Out of all the fears I could have....

So I had an appointment with my new(old-ish) doctor a couple of weeks ago. I didn't have an ultrasound like I was expecting but she did use a doppler to listen to the heart beat. I say heart beat (singular) because with a handheld doppler minus a ultrasound you can't tell which twin you are listening to nor if you are listening to a different one when you move it around. So at least one of them is doing well?! But I think they are both doing just fine.

We seem to be having here lately some rooming problems. While they feel it is important to make mommy feel the need to pee after taking two steps out of the bathroom I feel I was here first kiddos, my bladder is off limits!! I think we need to have a home owners meeting one-on-one...

I have FINALLY gained some weight. Ok I will spill my weight on the internet and if I get mad later about this I caulk it up to pregnancy brain.... I was 157 3 weeks before finding out I was pregnant. The day the pregnancy was confirmed, 156 (10 days later) The first sono, 157. Second sono (five days later) 158, (4wks later) third sono 153, (6wks later at my most recent doc appointment) 154, and today just for shits and giggles 159. Boo-ya baby! I got weight!! Now granted I was considered "over -weight" for my height so on top of constant "24 hour sickness" I think the reason I wasn't gaining weight is because I really didn't need too. I mean seriously, my ass is GONE! Not there, slide off the couch if I'm not careful GONE!! My love handles have diminished, and lets just say if it weren't for my prego belly i bet I could totally fit into those size 7 jeans I wore when I first met David. Yea I'm proud! But to top of the excitement I finally look prego, I think I may have passed the "is she fat or pregnant?" stage! Which I was sooo scared about.

Which allows me to contemplate other things that I am deathly frightened about....like give me a panick attack if I think to long frightened about....

Number One... The IV, So I have had several IV's in my lifetime, not as many as most, but deff more than some. But during Labor and delivery the placement of that thing is gonna have to be somewhere else besides the top of my hand....Im one of those that talks with my hands. But put an IV in it and it is stiff as a board. Im soooo scared its gonna pop out or hurt me....I really hope they can put in like on the inside of my arm (not the elbow, but between elbow and wrist) I will really have to talk to Dr. B about that....Ima need that hand, and it wont be in use if an IV is on top of it...

Number Two.... C Section....TERRIFIED....PETRIFIED.... 2 in every 3 twin pregnancies result in c sections...and omg I am SCARED. What I am suppose to understand is that during a c section you are awake...but you dont feel pain...BUT you do feel the pulling, tugging, pressure, and that scares the crap outta me...I dont wanna feel a darn thing....its one to feel all that during a vaginal birth I GET THAT! But during a c section, no no no sir....Me and Dr. B are gonna have to have a heart to heart on this one...I cannot endure that...It makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it...I breath heavily....I just...I just cannot....omg no....

Other than that though...Im cool...for now.... I cannot wait to feel the first kick(s). That suppose to be really weird feeling I heard, so I'm excited...

I cant wait to find out what our bubbles are...now that is the scariest thing out of it all. Cause on top of that, I haven't "seen" my bubbles in like i dunno....8 weeks or so, Id have to get my calendar to figure it out...so the last time I saw them they looked like little aliens. So are they ok? are they playing nice? Dont hit your siblings!! hahaha or my bladder....hehehe

So yea....Nov 9th is the day to find out what they are...hoping for boy and girl!! But we will see!!! Of course I will let you know!!

Have a great week kiddos!!

-C

First Blog in Awhile....

So getting back into the step of blogging has been a rough one. I know I need to blog to keep people in touch with what is happening around me and to free myself from any and all things that could make my days worse if I fret on them but actually taking the time to sit and type has been a journey that has taken well over a month to come to grips with and just do. I feel as though I have just walked into a store that I know I have been in before but looking around it isn't the same. Its like woah new...different....change. I know that sounds weird, considering I cannot actually be stepping into my blog persay, but its how I percive it.

Since our last entry I have had some major changes in my life. My husband and I have moved back to our hometown areas. Well my hometown, his is only a 30 minute drive away so his is in the area as well. His job that he has been at in the Austin area had its run and now we have moved back to wait out a transfer of service so that he may persue his dreams of joining the Coast Guard. That waiting to be 2 months to 2 years so we are in this for the long haul.

I have since seen my babies again. We changed doctors briefly and though we LOVED our new doctor, due to the move we were only able to see him once, but if we should end up back in the Austin area before the end of this pregnancy I will be going back. He was wonderful. Thank you Lauren for sending me to him!

Our babies are fraturnal (sp>?) twins. They are healthy even though you would think not for how awful I have been doing. Though I have since been admitted to the ER since this ultrasound due to serious dehydration they seem to be oblivious to it all and which that I am grateful. But my body just needed a reboot. My saving grace called Zofran seem to fall short for a few days causing me to not hold down food, and eventually liquids. But three bags of saline and some liquid zofran and phenigrin straight into my blood stream seem to do the trick and so I am back and doing what a normal 13 almost 14 week pregnant woman should be doing....sleeping, and trying to hold down every last bit of food available. Though the zofran has helped, I still have moments that I have heard that seem to reinact some sceens of the Exocist. David thinks that maybe we should tape the entire pregnancy...it could later be used as a sitcom.

We began our journey of "The Move" one our one year anniversary. My dad came down to help pack and load the POD we got, and help move the things we would have to bring back up here to Marshall. We left at about 4 pm that night. About 7 I began calling David to let him know of our journey. I was very proud and wanted to tell him that I had not thrown up at all on our trip and that we were almost home. He never answered. I called several more times and chaulked it up to him having his cell on vibrate and due to no hard surfaces remotely close to the tv he was probably playing xbox on, i didn't worry. later that evening while I was asleep I got several phone calls from an unknown number that I refused to answer, by the 5 call I was mad and answered with "What do you want?" Luckily David doesnt remember that cause he was still out of it. He had been in a wreck. He rolled his truck. Totalled. To pass all the drama I had a friend from his work pick him up, his Dad drove down and stayed til he was able to come home, and he only suffered a small concusion, black eye, blood eye, rash from the seat belt and a cut on his arm. He had fallen asleep at the wheel thus saving him from any really harm cause he was limp. Thankfully no one else was invovled and we are in the final stages of the insurance mess, so we will be able to purchase a new vehicle, but we think we will wait til later. We still have my trusty PT Crusier to use.

We are almost completely settled into our new place (my mothers) there are still somethings on the carport that we need to find places inside for, but other than that we are good. My old room will soon be stripped out and repainted and redecorated. I am very excited about this. I had a moment in high school that posessed me to paint one wall red, another black, and another silver so to cover that and go to a pretty light torqouise with antigue white accent is going to take time and extra effort but we can handle this. I just need to find a really good face mask to not breath in the fumes and I am set.

Though I am happy to be back in the presences of old friends that I missed so much while being down south, I can't help but have my heart torn again because I miss my friends that are still down there. We have promised to keep in touch and hopefully we will but I miss seeing them on a regular basis. Not only that, but you see how long it took me to blog, imagine how hard it is for me to just type a hello to them. Its as though I want to cut myself off from the world momentarily but doing that could result in a loss which I cannot handle. I know one will read this, so I just want to say that I am sorry if I don't message enough, I just don't have the energy or the want to get on the computer to type. I will make it up eventually but right now it won't happen as much. But you know I will be here if you ever need me.

With that said I bid you ado. I think it is time for our morning snack =] I have an appointment with a nurse tomorrow to fill out paperwork for my new doctor, and then to schedule an appointment on Monday with said doctor (don't ask me why I need a nurse to fill out paperwork, ask them!) so next week I will have an update! Until then besafe, don't do anything I wouldn't do!! haha

-C